


Even the Best Laid Plans do not Make Room for the Human Heart

by ShadeSpeaks



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Neo World Program (Dangan Ronpa), Sad with a Happy Ending, Survivor Guilt, nekodam if you squint, references to Dr3 anime
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-24
Updated: 2020-10-24
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:35:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27171853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShadeSpeaks/pseuds/ShadeSpeaks
Summary: After waking up from the Neo-world program, Gundham quickly realizes he has a score to settle with the Ultimate Team Manager.
Relationships: Nidai Nekomaru & Tanaka Gundham
Comments: 1
Kudos: 18





	Even the Best Laid Plans do not Make Room for the Human Heart

**Author's Note:**

> The premise behind this is that I’ve had a headcanon forever that even though both Gundham and Nekomaru agreed to and ultimately went through with their plan together that Gundham would feel immensely guilty for sacrificing even a willing participant for the sake of the others’ lives. 
> 
> I do think that Gundham’s actions in-game prove that he cares about the others’ safety even if he doesn’t tend to show it.
> 
> Also, maybe it’s just because I didn’t get into this series until after all the games were released but I don’t think I’ve seen anyone discuss Gundham and Nekomaru’s pact or their “rivalry”/relationship in chapter 4. I find the idea interesting and bittersweet so I wanted to explore it.

The Ultimate Princess and Ultimate Breeder sat side by side, bodies angled to face each other. 

“Gundham, are you quite sure about this?” As she spoke, the princess reached out before stopping herself short and letting her hand hover just above Gundham’s unwrapped arm. 

He was never more thankful that she had become close with him during the game than right now. 

“Indeed, my dark lady. I feel I must speak with the loud large one as soon as possible.” Perhaps the Ultimate Team Manager deserved to be referred to by his actual name or maybe Gundham didn’t have any right to call him by his name at all. It was too difficult to tell so the comfortable habit of odd nicknames would stay for now.

Most of the students of Hope’s Peak class 77 had already woken from the Neo-world program, disoriented but otherwise alive and well. Since waking up himself, Gundham had spent all of his time in a small common area near the chambers where the remainder of his classmates still slumbered. A fully life-like simulation such as this wasn’t exactly perfected yet so the students woke up sporadically.

Of course, Future Foundation had set up rooms. They fully expected that those who entered the program would require some time to recoup before returning to the outside world. 

Though he had been awake for a few days now, Gundham had yet to see the inside of any of these rooms. The Overlord of Ice had been unable to relax enough to go very far from the sleeping chambers. Upon waking up and learning that the Killing School Trip was a simulation, that everyone would wake up and be alright. He was relieved of course, but that relief quickly disappeared as worry pooled in his stomach. 

He would have to face Nekomaru.

The usually composed student could still feel that anxiety swirling inside him. Gundham had never thought that he would do a fellow classmate actual harm. Sure, he tended to keep his distance and acted coldly toward the others but he really…did want them all to be safe.   
To think the situation had developed the way it did…that Monokuma would go so far as to starve all of the students and nearly kill them all in one fell swoop, it was still mind boggling. Even though the circumstances became so dire and even though Nekomaru had agreed to their plan, Gundham still could almost not believe what he had done. He was the Ultimate Breeder! He helped create and sustain life, not end it for hell’s sake! 

To an animal breeder, an unnatural and avoidable death was the gravest possible sin! The mark of one unfit—! 

Ah, but based on Sonia’s worried expression, he was getting too wrapped up in his own head again. He tried to wipe the worry off his face as best he could. Worrying her wouldn’t do them any good. He just needed to talk with Nekomaru. If the coach would listen to him and he could actually find the words to say, that is.

The Breeder was soon pulled from his thoughts, however, as loud whooping resounded through the halls. Both students gave a start at the sudden noise cutting through the silence they’d become rather accustomed to.

Though, this had become a somewhat common occurrence as more students of class 77 woke up from the Neo-World Program and were reunited with those they were closest with. 

“OLD MAN!”   
Gundham tensed and reflexively grabbed at his scarf as he heard Akane yell out. More loud voices followed but he couldn’t make out what the two were saying.

The princess spoke again, “Are you alright?” 

Gundham’s breath hitched at that. She was looking at him as if he might crack under the pressure. He couldn’t decide if he found that infuriating or endearing. 

“I—yes.” His brows were knit together and he glanced toward the room where the simulation chambers sat. "We should give them a moment to reunite but I feel I must speak with him as soon as possible.” 

The yelling grew more muffled as a few minutes passed. Gundham gave a short nod to his companion and the two stood up from their chairs. The sound of heavy boots and the sharp clicking of heels reverberated through the hall, involuntarily invoking mental images of a stampede and the devas and—. 

Shaking that thought from his mind, Gundham straightened his shoulders and increased his pace to keep up with Sonia until they reached the open door where the light from the machines was pouring out into the hall.

From the doorway, he could see Nekomaru releasing Akane from a bear hug so tight it looked painful.

The pair did not stay unnoticed for long as Nekomaru called out, “Gundham! Sonia! So you two are awake as well? It’s good to see you guys!” 

Nekomaru looked...like his usual self. As if he hadn’t just spent months in a life-support machine. He probably looked the best out of everyone first waking up, like nothing had happened to him at all. 

“Akane filled me in a little but I’m not the last one awake, am I? It wouldn’t be right for the Ultimate Team Manager to sleep the longest!”

He was just as loud and enthusiastic as normal too. 

Sonia answered as she gestured to the still occupied simulation chambers spread throughout the room behind the coach, “Ah, no, you are not the last. We are still waiting for Nagito, Mikan, and Kazuichi to wake.”

There was a pause as Nekomaru looked thoughtfully toward his still sleeping classmates.

“If I may,” Gundham stepped forward a bit. “I would like to speak with you.”

“Huh? Of course, man! What’s on your mind?” Gundham bristled at the casual way Nekomaru spoke to him, as if everyone didn’t know what had happened between them, but refused to falter nonetheless.

Sonia discreetly beckoned Akane over to her and led her back down the hall to give the two some privacy. 

Gundham looked just past Nekomaru and toyed with the bandages around his arm for a moment, uncharacteristically unsure of himself. The quiet mechanical humming of the chambers seemed deafening.

“What’s bothering you? You usually speak with such confidence and bravado! Loud and proud like you were shouting from the bottom of your diaphragm! What happened to that?” Loud and boisterous as he usually was, Nekomaru wouldn’t have been the Ultimate Team Manager if he couldn’t read people and gently (or not so gently) push them past their normal limits.

“DON’T TELL ME YOU’VE LOST YOUR FIGHTING SPIRIIIIIIT!”

Gundham flinched a bit at Nekomaru’s sudden yelling, not that he’d ever admit that fact. 

“There is...no need to raise your voice. You could practice necromancy with your vocal  
cords alone!”

“You’re not the first person to tell me I could raise the dead!” Nekomaru laughed at that before looking expectantly at Gundham again. 

He would be the type to not let something go, wouldn’t he?

Steeling himself, Gundham finally said what he’d come here to say.

“I,” Gundham balled his hands into fists and looked Nekomaru in the eyes for the first time since their battle in the Neo-World Program. “I came to beseech your forgiveness...I want to apologize to you.”

“Apologize? What for?” Nekomaru scratched at his nose the same way he did whenever he was confused.

He was far too nonchalant for Gundham’s taste, along with being heinously concerned about his wellbeing.

Oh, how he wished Mother Earth would swallow him up to be torn asunder in the depths of hell so that he could pay for his crimes.

Gundham’s voice rose and he barely kept it from shaking.  
“What for? What FOR? For what I did to you, you fool! 

“What are you—you mean our plan? It was a success wasn’t it? Akane said that—“

“Our plan worked perfectly,” Gundham spat out through gritted teeth.

“Then what’s the issue? Our plan worked, you should be happy!”

“Have you forgotten that I murdered you? Have you really no qualm with me now that we are face to face again due to the sorcery of these machines? Bring the rage of a thousand suns upon me, you fiendish thing!”

“AhahaHAHAHA!” Nekomaru threw his head back and laughed like he’d just been told the funniest joke he’d ever heard, clutching at his sides in mirth.

“Do you now mock me? I said to release your anger!” Gundham widened his stance, as if preparing for Nekomaru to strike him.

“Did you think I would be mad because you won? That was our deal! Your technique was admirable and you won fair and square! Nekomaru Nidai is no sore loser!”

Gundham was taken aback by this. Nekomaru had just been saved from a near-death experience only to be taken out of the killing game completely. Surely he would be angry about it, right?

“But I—I _killed_ you.” 

“You have nothing to feel guilty about. We both agreed to this plan before going through with it. You didn’t do what you did for selfish reasons, we both sacrificed our lives to save the others! Am I wrong?” 

Silence.

Nekomaru thought this was about guilt? It was about justice! Revenge even! 

Gundham opened his mouth to tell him as much but the coach kept talking. 

“What would have happened if we didn’t strike a deal? We could have lost everyone! Probably would have with how drained we all were...You and I waited until the last moment and made the best of a shitty situation.”

Gundham was speechless. Of course that’s what happened. He knew that, obviously. It’s what pushed him to go through the Final Dead Room and play his part in their sacrificial plan but...he still couldn’t let go of the weight on his chest. 

Nekomaru crossed his arms in thought. “Besides, I’m not the only one that died. If anything, what you had to go through was worse! I can’t imagine facing everyone in a trial as...well...”

“The blackened,” Gundham finished the thought for him. 

Nekomaru glossed over that word.  
“I’m guessing you made yourself out to be the bad guy, am I right? I know you position yourself that way but it still must have been hard. You didn’t go into that trial with any expectation of coming out alive.”

Gundham was angry now. He didn’t come here for pity or whatever coach pep talk bullshit this was. 

Why was he being so gods damn nice anyway! Didn’t he realize he was speaking with his own murderer?

“Cease this foolishness at—“

“What if I had won?”

“...What?” For once, Gundham had no long-winded response. The wind was completely taken out of his sails. 

Nekomaru rubbed at his chin, thinking.

“I consider us pretty evenly matched so what if there was no sleep button, or you didn’t want to involve the devas, or any number of possibilities?” He spoke with the confidence of someone used to analyzing his athletes’ moves. 

“What if something had gone down differently and it was me who walked away?”

Gundham just stared, trying to process that possibility. 

“Aha! I see those wheels turning!” Nekomaru was smiling again.

Gundham’s throat and eyes burned but he pushed away that particular mortal urge.

Though Nekomaru, ever the talker, didn’t let him dwell on it for long.  
“Now that we have our school memories back, do you remember during the Reserve Course riots when you and I stayed behind so the others could reach Chiaki and Nagito safely?”

Gundham nodded dumbly.  
“…I recall.”

“We’re like one big team,huh? You and I have always played defense! We’ve always protected the others.”  
Nekomaru was smiling wider now, reliving their two-man army from what felt like a lifetime ago. 

Gundham, however, was scowling. Seeing Nekomaru look so carefree had brought him back to his senses.  
“This is not some child’s play of holding back wrathful students! I took a life!” He angrily gestured toward himself.

“I’m still here, right?”

A pause.

“Well yes, but only because—“

“I get that you’ve got a lot to come to terms with,” Nekomaru rubbed the back of his neck. “We all do.”

He crouched down the couple of inches it took to be at eye level with Gundham. In any other context he’d look like he was about to encourage a player to ‘get their head back in the game.’ 

“We both agreed to the terms and did what we thought was best.” He spoke matter-of-fairly. “If anything, I’m proud of you for going through with it!” 

He gave a thumbs up while Gundham only looked conflicted.

Nekomaru suddenly pumped a fist in the air.

“I know! Let me do “it” to you! That’ll get you feeling good again! No more moping around!”

Gundham reflexively took a step back.  
“Tch, you fool! Do you not recall that my skin is highly—“

“Poisonous! I remember! But you look like you’re wearing about six layers as usual,” Nekomaru said while appraising Gundham’s usual outfit. 

Well, he wasn’t wrong. 

Nekomaru reached his hands out, hovering a good distance from Gundham’s shoulders. “Do you trust me?”

Gundham nodded curtly. Nekomaru would quickly see the foolishness of his actions and they could continue this conversation. “If you wish to bring destruct—oh.”

As soon as he’d gotten assent, Nekomaru had started his work. His large hands moved dexterously, familiar with the movements of his own special massage technique that he only referred to as “it.” 

In seconds, Gundham felt his shoulders (which he hadn’t even realized were tensed and hiked up nearly to his ears) relax and drop. 

Gundham was usually against physical contact but with his several layers of clothing between them as a way around that, even he couldn’t resist Nekomaru’s famous technique.

He felt himself begin to relax all over and without either one talking he was forced to think about what Nekomaru had said. Further than that, perhaps even consider that he was right. 

Nekomaru kept going, taking care to not brush Gundham’s neck where his scarf and jacket didn’t quite cover every inch of skin.

Every ounce of fatigue, ache from being in simulation chamber for so long, and pain from tense muscles disappeared. Gundham would be willing to call it magic when he figured out how to speak again. 

It was no wonder now how the athletes under Nekomaru’s care were able to push past their limits. 

Nekomaru’s look of concentration morphed into a gigantic grin. “I can tell you’re already feeling better! See? Everything’s fine!”

Everything was not fine.

...but maybe they could be eventually. 

Even Gundham had to admit that after “it.”

Nekomaru released him and proudly put his hands on his hips while still grinning from ear to ear. “Pretty great, right? Come see me and I’ll do “it” to you anytime!”

Oh, Gundham would most definitely be calling on Nekomaru again soon. Perhaps he could allow Nekomaru to pet the devas in return to make it a fair trade for such an amazing talent.

A hand clamping down on his shoulder brought him out of his stupor. 

Nekomaru still had that foolish, endearing grin on his face.

“Come on, champ. Let’s go give a big hello to the others, yeah?”

**Author's Note:**

> I’m back with more niche content and overly dramatic titles! Yay!
> 
> I struggle with writing emotional stuff and getting the feel I wanted so I hope I did them justice!  
> I was really worried about making Nekomaru too serious here but I read his FTEs and he has moments all the time where he is serious and thoughtful, not all shit jokes and yelling. 
> 
> Maybe I’m reading too far into things but I interpreted Gundham’s whole “my skin is poisonous” thing as him metaphorically distancing himself from the others and literally not wanting to be touched so I had to throw in Sonia and Nekomaru respecting his boundaries no matter what his reasoning is (let’s be real his mom’s cooking making him poisonous is pretty ridiculous) because that’s just good for the soul. 
> 
> Also, I don’t think that there’s a canonical order that the students wake up in so I just picked a few that were still asleep.


End file.
